I love you, I remember you (One-Shot)
by Lost Skies
Summary: In present times, Go Ha Jin––once known as Hae Soo––recalls missing memories of her tragic past. Completely broken down from her previous life, Ha Jin begins to realize her mistakes and regrets. If she could have one more chance––one more opportunity––to change the outcome of the tragic love between Hae Soo and Wang So, she would give anything to mend things.


**A/N: First fanfic for Scarlet Heart Ryeo! Not much, but this is just a one-shot of an alternate ending to the drama and how I could have seen it go! Enjoy!**

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A trembling hand clasped over Ha Jin's mouth as she cried silently into the palm of her hand. An agonizing pain-one unbearable-filled her chest with each breath she took. A single look at those pictures of Korea's history sent her heart into a state of torment. She couldn't bring herself to look at them again, but _something_ took control of her and forced her to glance reluctantly.

Those paintings hung all around her carried a sense of familiarity, as if she had seen them before. But none of her friends were painters, nor did she know one. Her tear-stained eyes drifted towards the nearest painting; a portrait of Goryeo's prominent King, Wang So, standing alone before his palace. Every stroke in the painting detailed the King beautifully. But despite the beauty of the painting, there was a sorrowful atmosphere to it. The King stood all alone, having lost his loyal supporters and even more. Several brothers, his parents-both loving, and not-so loving-and even the love of his life; the woman he sacrificed everything for.

Hae Soo was that woman.

His brothers had turned against him in one way or another, and some even died in his presence. All of their loyalty had vanished, leaving Wang So alone.

His father died too soon, leaving Wang So with his abusive mother.

King––no, rather _Prince_ ––Wang So had suffered through so much torment on his own, and the only person who he could look to for support since the very beginning was Hae Soo. However, Ha Jin-in her previous life-had only let him down by continuously rejecting his love and refusing to offer him any support.

His hands were stained with blood. The burdens were indeed heavy for him alone. Yet, he always carried such a heavy burden, and he carried on to be a prominent and well-loved King because he had someone looking out for him. Someone who-despite being threatened-gave Wang So a chance to better himself. Hae Soo never called him a monster.

But it would be a lie to say that she never thought of him as one. Ha Jin could clearly recall those horrible, horrible thoughts. She was terrified of him, afraid of the power he had easily sacrificed everything for. Ha Jin couldn't understand why he hungered for power before, but now she was aware that the power was necessary to keep her safe, and to keep his brothers from spilling any more blood. Everyone who had sat on the throne had lost their mind, one way or another. And even those who hadn't sat on the throne were still influenced and manipulated by the throne's power.

For so long, Ha Jin believed in Wang So. But towards the end of their tragic love, she decided that enough was _enough_. Ha Jin could faintly recall telling Wang So that there was already too much blood in their relationship, but what did that even mean? Blood had been spilled-not for her, but for the sake of his kingdom. He hadn't spilled any blood for her sake, as far as she could recall.

 _Hae Soo.. She was simply exhausted. It wasn't Wang So that drove her away.._

The throne drove her away. A simple throne and its title tore a family apart. A Queen disowned her son because he wasn't fit for the throne, nor was he a clear successor. The scar on his face prevented him from ever being considered for the throne, and because the throne carried power, the Queen wanted nothing to do with the monster she birthed. The King, who sat atop his throne, threw away true love for the throne, and made empty promises to a woman that remained by his side without question. Because of the throne's power, he was able to throw away his love. The power ultimately outweighed the King and Queen's love. And the Prince's-all of them-separated because of the throne itself. At one point, they were what Ha Jin saw as a beautiful family. None of them cared for the throne. But then once the throne changed suitors, it created a blood bath. The first prince took the throne and was slowly murdered. And afterwards, it became a battle for the throne.

The throne-the title of King-changed people. Everyone changed. And Hae Soo had been tired of witnessing death, after death. She couldn't bear the heartache of seeing another fall to their own demise, and she couldn't bring herself to remain by the throne, where unfortunately Wang So had been seated. At the time, Hae Soo was afraid of what the throne would do to Wang So. Before Woo Hee's death, Hae Soo had already begun to see changes in Wang So. He lacked proper sleep, and he was always being pressured into something because of who he had become. Hae Soo had been very afraid, not of the man she grew to love, but of the damages it would leave behind. Had Wang So not taken the throne, she would have begged him to leave the palace with her.

Ha Jin regretted leaving him the most. There was no doubt she carried a deep and strong connection with Hae Soo. It almost didn't seem real. But surely the dreams and historical records being similar couldn't be just plain coincidence.

If there was one thing Ha Jin would want to fix so desperately, it would be the mending of Wang So's and Hae Soo's love. It wasn't right that she abandoned Wang So, who desperately needed support at the most difficult time of his life. And it wasn't right that she didn't explain herself fully. She _loved_ Wang So. He protected her, _supported her_ , even when he was threatened by the King himself. Wang So gave up his pride and family, just to protect Hae Soo. He did whatever he could to keep her safe. He remained patient with her. But despite it all, Ha Jin knew she made it clear that all his decisions were in vain. Everything he did was for nothing, because she lacked the patience he carried for her.

She lacked patience.

She abandoned him.

Until her very death, she hurt him continuously, married his brother for the _sake_ of escaping him, and made Wang So feel unloved.

She made him feel like an absolute monster.

Some questions left her wondering whether or not he cared that she had passed away. Did he ever discover their daughter? Did he hate his brother, and did he hate her? There was so much she didn't know. So much was left in the open and unknown.

More tears dripped down her cheeks as the painful ache in her chest returned once again. Despite not being Hae Soo, she was still afraid to lose the King's love. Ha Jin was not Hae Soo now, and she might've never been, but the thought alone was enough to send her to tears, again and again. All the memories returned faintly. The amount of deaths she witnessed and the heartbreak she felt in that life was just as worse now.

 _Come on, Ha Jin.. You can't keep like this.._

Barely being able to get up, she remained on her knees as she heard light footsteps approaching. Feeling utter humiliation now for being seen in such a pitiful state, she swallowed thickly; feeling the dryness in her throat. But to her surprise, the footsteps approached her, and a hand was lowered to her. As she blinked away the tears, she took a small, reluctant glimpse at the hand and saw a navy, blue handkerchief offered to her. The gesture was relieving to see. Instead of making the situation more awkward than needed to be, a gesture of kindness was offered. Something Ha Jin really needed in the time of all the heartache. As she reached for the handkerchief, her hand brushed gently against his and she found herself calming down once more. She wiped her tears away with the handkerchief before raising her sorrow-filled gaze to meet the other's.

The kind-hearted person was a male of tall height. He was dressed casually in a dark suit, though, as soon as she rested her gaze on his facial features, she made eye contact with the generous man. Something drew her towards his eyes, which were tranquil and very much pleasing to look at. However, for a few seconds, she was unable to break away from his gaze.

And even though she had already taken the man's offering, his hand was still held out to her. She then-hesitantly-took his hand and he pulled her up off her feet without any troubles. Clutching onto his handkerchief tightly, she finally forced her eyes away from his alluring gaze.

"Thank...you.."

He shrugged off her thanks. "You don't need to worry about returning that."

Again, she dipped her head in thanks. Just as she had turned away, feeling slightly humiliated for being spotted, his voice called out to her.

"I am curious though. Were you emotional over these paintings?" he prompted her, gazing at the paintings now. As she turned back to face the paintings as well, her eyes traveled from one, to another. "They're beautiful," she breathed out. "And I was always interested in history.. Though.." She swallowed thickly, shaking her head in dismissal. "This time in history seems to get to me every time.."

"Goryeo, during… Gwangjong's reign, am I correct?" he questioned, peering curiously at the paintings before glancing at her with the same curiosity. "A well-known King, who was brother to many. Isn't that also correct?"  
"Yes," she whispered silently, closing her eyes briefly. "During this time in Goryeo, some of his siblings were...killed." She finished her sentence with a hint of sorrow in her voice.

"I can see why that would make you emotional, but isn't that life? Terrible things happen, but good things as well. I'm not too deep into Goryeo's history, but I heard he found true love with...a court lady? Or is that just a rumor?" During her silence, the man continued. "You seem to be well educated on Korea's history, but I suppose you wouldn't know the answer to that.."

"Those rumors were correct.. I forgot where I found that out though.." She forced a small smile onto her lips and rubbed the back of her head. "But I did read up that he was deeply in love with a court lady.. There was even a song that made him fall in love with her.. But I've never heard it."

"So he had something good in his life...that's correct?"

"It _was_ something good in his life," she corrected quietly. "But...he's alone in that painting.. And he was married to his half sister. The court lady was nothing but a mistress in the history books.." Before the mysterious man could continue with questions, Ha Jin went on sadly. "She ended up passing away and their love was never recorded.. I think that was the saddest part of it all.. She abandoned him and left him all alone.." With a light, shaky exhale, she gestured to the painting where he stood alone at the palace. "I think… that is what this painting signifies."

Tears threatened to spill, but she held them back. She would not make a fool of herself any further. But the man's pestering questions weren't helping.

"If she abandoned him, then doesn't that signify she hated him? Or perhaps never loved him to begin with? Maybe this love was one-sided.." he murmured quietly, examining the painting with interest. "I wonder if she had any regrets before passing.. Not that she could make up for them. I think that is the most tragic part."

Ha Jin didn't even look at him. She screwed her eyes shut and inhaled heavily. "If I had been her.. I think I would have wanted to tell him I loved him one last time.. There love was real, and it was not one-sided. Had it been, I don't think she would have been with him for so long. I think it was real, and very much true.. I wish she would have done something different. No.. I bet she would have, given the chance.."

As a single tear slipped down her cheek, she wiped it away immediately. _I.. want to make up for it, Wang So.. Please, forgive me.._

"Then why don't you take the opportunity?" The question caught her off guard. Immediately, she spun around to face the mysterious man who was now approaching her with a small grin of his own. "You've been given a second chance to do something different."

Ha Jin's gaze met with his once more, though this time was much more different. While his gaze was still filled with tranquility, she found something much more deeper within them. It was a look of warmth and tenderness; something she could once recall. Not in this life, but in her past life.

More easily now, as he smiled, she could see it!

 _Wang So.. Wang.. So.._

Only one man had looked at her in such a way and had been genuine about it. It was from a man who knew what true love was. A man who loved deeply and genuinely. But despite finally making the connection, she couldn't bring herself to utter a single word. Instead, her teary eyes watered more and she grasped a hand onto the fabric of her shirt. She squeezed, gripping the fabric tightly between her fingers.

There was so much she wanted to say, as both Ha Jin and Hae Soo, but she couldn't bring herself to say anything. She didn't know where to start. And even though she had abandoned him...he still looked at her with the same tenderness as he did when they were deep in love. Surely those feelings and memories couldn't have passed on? And if that did happen to be true, why wasn't he angry with her?

"I guess I will be the first one to initiate the first move. I always have, haven't I?" He grinned warmly and approached her enough to close the gap between them. His arms wrapped around her as he pulled her close against his chest, offering his shoulder for her to cry on-if necessary. Almost simultaneously, she returned the gesture by resting her hands and arms on his chest, gripping onto him tightly and longingly as she cried silently into his chest. Her fingers tightened onto the fabric of his almost perfect suit, ruining and wrinkling it without meaning to. But as the tears fell continuously, she was able to make out a few words between shaky breaths.

"I'm so.. Sorry!" she gasped out, screwing her eyes shut. "I should.. have been patient.. I should have waited. But I was so afraid.. I didn't want the throne to hurt you anymore."

Like Wang So, he had comforted her the best he could, rubbing her back soothingly, but also offering her comfort by being in her presence. He held her, just as she had for him when he was in tears. Their presence alone was enough for one another.

"I don't need any apologies. Hearing that Hae Soo loved me was enough. All this time, I was plagued with both dreams and nightmares.. It really feels like it's a part of my life, even now." He pulled back a little to make eye contact with her. "But I found you, my Hae Soo.. Ever since I lost you, I promised I would find you, even if it took a whole new world to do so. But this time, please do not reject me.. I want to be given another opportunity. But this time, nothing will stand between us. I will win you over again, because you are the only one I want. No matter how long it takes. In this world, I will make sure everything is different."

He pulled her back in for another affectionate embrace. Despite the two only just meeting in this world, their identical memories allowed them to feel closer already. And Ha Jin was certain this would only deepen their relationship in the future, because nothing would erase the feelings of their past. Even though Wang So's and Hae Soo's love was unsuccessful and tragic, Ha Jin was certain that she and him could make it work in this world and mend the emotions of the past. She closed her eyes and took in his sweet scent, allowing herself to relax in his arms.

 _I love you, Wang So.. In every world, in every life.. I will always love you._


End file.
